June is the usually rainiest month in this part of the world. Combined with melting snow pack in the mountains it can be a dangerous season. When dire predictions of more flooding were broadcast on various media this week part of this song started playing in my head:
If the sky above you should turn dark and full of clouds and that old north wind should begin to blow, keep your head together and call My name out loud. Soon I will be knocking upon your door. You just call out My name, and you know where ever I am I’ll come running to see you again. Winter, spring, summer, or fall, all you have to do is call and I’ll be there.
Hey, ain’t it good to know that you’ve got a Friend?
People can be so cold. They’ll hurt you and desert you. Well, they’ll take your soul if you let them, oh yeah, but don’t you let them.
You just call out My name, and you know where ever I am I’ll come running to see you again. Winter, spring, summer, or fall, all you have to do is call, “Lord!” I’ll be there, yeah, yeah, you’ve got a Friend. You’ve got a Friend. Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a Friend.
Ain’t it good to know you’ve got a Friend. Oh, yeah, yeah, you’ve got a Friend.
(You’ve got a Friend by James Taylor and Carole King)
There is more than one kind of storm. Sometimes people have no idea of the kind of storms that rage inside our hearts. A line in another old song talks about “fightings within and fears without” and yet, “just as I am, I come” to the Lover of my soul.
Calling out for help is not always easy, particularly for those of us who don’t want to admit we need help.
I looked at the dark clouds. I called. He answered.
The rain was heavy, and there was some flooding, but nothing as serious as was predicted.
I looked at the raging storm within. I called. He answered.
Over the years, I have become convinced that in the Christian life at least two things are certain: God never changes, and we are always changing. Our lives as Christians are a continual transition from one place to another, one level to another, one understanding to another. The purpose of spiritual light is to bring us into change and growth. The more light we have, the more change we experience; and the more we change (for the better), the more we are brought into higher levels of glory. Unless we are in constant transition, we will stop somewhere along the way and settle down. The Christian life is a frontier. God did not call us to be settlers, but to be pilgrims and pioneers.
I’ve known many pianists, but very few excellent accompanists. It’s a rare and beautiful talent that not only requires skill, but also outstanding sensitivity and a willingness to put someone ahead of oneself. It’s not fair, but that’s the way it works. As I thought about it I realized that good accompanists demonstrate servant leadership.
The topic came up for me as I stumbled upon a Youtube video in which a famous conductor was playing piano accompaniment for an equally famous singer. It was a great performance including several of my favourite lieder by Brahms (and became even better when another famous conductor made a brief appearance as page turner.) When I listened a second time to the song, Von Ewiger Liebe (Of Eternal Love), I could hear the accompanist’s ego asserting itself as he kind of dragged the singer along during a display of passionate virtuoso playing. Brahms is not easy to play, and if I could do it I would probably take off with the music too, but as a singer I remember what it feels like to be in competition with an accompanist who is bounding for the finish line ahead of me.
The worst accompanist I ever had will remain nameless. The event planners hired him and assured me he was a competent musician who played professionally. I sent the music on weeks in advance. Travel delays and bad directions meant we only had half an hour to rehearse.
“So how does it go?” he asked, sitting at a piano with no music in sight.
“You did get the music, didn’t you?” I said with a sense of panic about to introduce itself. “I sent it to you weeks ago.”
“I don’t read music,” he stated, seemingly without concern. “Just sing a few bars and I can pick it up.”
Now I appreciate jazz and most other forms of music, but with classical music one simply does not “pick it up.”
OK. Change of plan.
“Um…. how about a spiritual?” I was grabbing at whatever came to mind. “Sometimes I Feel Like a Motherless Child?” I did feel rather like crying for my mommy at that point. “It is slow and sad …it has a kind of blues feel,” I added just trying to be helpful, which it turns out was not.
We worked it out and added some more well-known music and rushed to the venue. I admit I was nervous and could have handled it with more aplomb had I any inkling that this guy’s professional piano experience was playing blues in a bar. I sang three verses of a two verse song and he kept playing, improvising…and improvising…and improvising. If this had been in his bar I could have enjoyed the two drink minimum while he did his thing without me, but instead I just stood around trying not to look surprised or fifth-wheelish and waited for an opportunity to jump back in. Eventually I rushed in and sang a big ta-da ending to a song which is meant to fade into a pianissimo -just to let the guy know that I, at least, was done.
At the end of the evening I took my compliments and my check and checked out.
Apparently the group invited him back for another gig. They didn’t invite me. (Although I did sing in a sold-out concert hall in that city later, with an orchestra which was too cumbersome to just “pick it up.”)
Once, when I was only about fourteen and singing in a large church I accidentally aspirated some saliva and choked right at my entry of the second verse -in front of God and everybody. The woman at the piano acted as though she heard nothing amiss as I coughed and cleared. She skilfully raced to the finish line without me. I slunk sheepishly off the stage swearing I would never do that again. (Thank God for an older gentlemen who encouraged me later when everyone else was too embarrassed to say anything.)
Here’s the thing. I did not feel honoured by either of those pianists because neither of them were listening. The only part that mattered was theirs.
Years later, to my horror, the same choking thing happened -and in front of folks who actually paid real money. This time my accompanist (who I freely admit was a superior musician) circled around, adding an improvised passage in a style consistent with the song to give me time to recover, and then modulated back into the introduction again. He swooped by like a hero on horseback to scoop me up and we rode off together, most of the audience none the wiser.
Once when he and I were looking at potential pieces for a concert I showed him the music for a song I liked but explained it was too low for me. He sight-read and transposed the unfamiliar piece of music at the same time. My jaw dropped. Later, when this guy gave musical advice, I listened. He was not a singer, but he was full of great advice.
Accompanists are often better musicians than the “soloist” (loathe as we singers are to admit that.) Sometimes they are also coaches or conductors. They know all the parts, not just their own. Making music is a collaboration and rehearsals are the place for discussion and compromise, but in performance a good accompanist lets the singer take the lead and will cover for things like rhythm errors and memory glitches. In private they are not afraid to call them out and work through a problem area, though.
When I hired professional accompanists for students the inexperienced often complained privately that the accompanist had played the piano too slowly in a performance.
“That’s because he’s much better than I am,” I explained. “You’re used to a teacher making heavy suggestions from the keyboard. Not only does this guy play all the notes -and accurately- he is listening and breathing with you. He’s just a hair behind you because onstage you are the one who sets the tempo. If he’s playing too slowly it’s because you slowed down waiting for him to do everything.”
When I thought about this singer/accompanist relationship I made a connection with leadership in the church. Ministry is not about doing it right, or drawing attention to oneself. It is not without honour or respect and actually requires superior understanding, skill and sensitivity -even nice clothes- but the job of a minister (whether apostle, prophet, teacher, evangelist or pastor) is to raise other people up to their potential in their own service to the Great Composer. It’s not to draw attention to themselves, nor even to do everything “right” by constantly taking control because others are not up to their standards.
Gerald Moore was a well-known accompanist. His love of music was greater than his love of recognition, although he was not a shy person. He teamed up with some of the greatest artists in the past century. In some videos only his hands were in the frame. He deserved more respect. The singer or instrumentalist received (and still receives) top-billing. He made them sound good, but anyone who has ever worked with an accompanist knew this man was a giant among musicians.
May those who desire to lead in the church raise others up with the same spirit of excellence and confident humility.
This is an example of his work. Morgen is a setting of a poem by the German poet John Henry Mackay (a story in itself) by Richard Strauss with Janet Baker before she was a Dame. Somehow Moore makes us forget that the piano is a percussion instrument. The song is about the hope of seeing a loved one again in the morning.
We hear much of love to God; Christ spoke much of love to man. We make a great deal of peace with heaven; Christ spoke much of peace on earth.
– Henry Drummond
The one who fears punishment has not been completed through love.
We love because He has first loved us.
(1 John 4:18,19)
The thing about fear is that once you are influenced by it you can be convinced to distrust your own sense of who God is and who you are and hand over spiritual discernment to “the experts” because they claim “extenuating circumstances.” This is how every major cult has started (including the philosophical movements that claim to be non-religious). It’s uncanny how often it manifests first in paranoia-based views of the future, followed by rigid authoritarian hierarchical structures, then strange attitudes toward sex and marriage and family structure. History repeats itself.
The thing about love is that it does not manipulate or coerce. Jesus’ love sets us free.
“God made you to love him supremely, but he lost you. He returned to get you back, but it took the cross to do it. He absorbed your darkness so that one day you can finally and dazzlingly become your true self and take your seat at his eternal feast.”
―Timothy Keller
You are my God, and I give You thanks; You are my God, and I praise You. Give thanks to our Eternal Lord; He is always good. He never ceases to be loving and kind.
(Psalm 118:28,29 The Voice)
May not a single moment of my life be spent outside the light, love and joy of God’s presence and not a moment without the entire surrender of myself as a vessel for Him to fill full of His Spirit and His love.
-Andrew Murray
James, the guy who came to believe that Jesus, his older brother, was God (and brothers have ample opportunity to observe character) wrote this: Just a moment, now, you who say, “We are going to such-and-such a city today or tomorrow. We shall stay there a year doing business and make a profit”! How do you know what will happen even tomorrow? What, after all, is your life? It is like a puff of smoke visible for a little while and then dissolving into thin air. Your remarks should be prefaced with, “If it is the Lord’s will, we shall be alive and will do so-and-so.”
We just learned that our friend, who has spent months preparing for a move to Western Africa and was about to depart in a few days, died suddenly during minor surgery. We are stunned, but trusting God to turn even this situation into something better than we hoped.
Here’s the thing: Trust is built on character. Proven character.
Come election time (which seems to be perpetual in some places) a great deal of money is thrown around trying to convince the public that this person they have never met is of exemplary character and actually cares deeply about your personal needs, Mrs. What-did you-say-your-name-was? We’ve all seen that game played long enough to know trust may be bought temporarily, but the truth will out. We’ve seen false promotion, but we’ve seen slander and spins and false accusations of opponents as well.
Jesus Christ was falsely accused and executed on the basis of those kind of accusations. Religious presumption has always said, “If you are really God and really in charge you will show your love in a way I would do it. If I were God people could indulge their cravings and fight to be on top without consequence to others or the environment. If I were the one who was all-loving, all-knowing and all-powerful I would give unlimited freedom and intervene miraculously to save people from the repercussions of listening to the father of lies if only to save my own reputation. If you are love, this is how you will show it.”
For many people abused by religious presumption on God’s grace (which ironically morphs into a legalistic portrayal of a vengeful God without grace) trust is difficult. It is difficult because they do not know him or his character because they have only heard about him from people with agendas. They have never met him personally.
Our friend’s wife has. In the midst of grief and turmoil and upset plans she can still say, “Blessed be the name of the Lord.” And our friend? To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. For a man who loved the Lord with his whole heart what could possibly be better?
I keep remembering the night when the Lord spoke kindly to me in a dream and said, “Those who are afraid to pray ‘Thy will be done’ do not fully comprehend my love.”
Was our friend a casualty of the clash between two kingdoms or was this Gods’ timing for his life? I don’t know. All I know is God is God and I am not. But he has proven his loving character to me over and over through Jesus Christ who loved me so much he said he’d rather die than live without me –and so he did. And then he conquered death so that we could be together forever. I trust that kind of love.
Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us.
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?
Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?
As it is written:
“For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.
I was about eight-years-old when the boys down the lane said they were going to beat me up for breaking their kite. It was a flimsy kite, one of those corner-store balsa wood and tissue paper assemblies with a picture of some serious stars and stripes American guy in a tall hat, who pointed his finger accusingly at a girl who didn’t know enough to stop running when the thing dive-bombed into the ground.
I had begged them for a chance to fly it and when they told me to grab the string and run, run, run, I did. Then it crashed and I apparently dragged it through the construction debris scattered in the empty lot. I saw one of the boys punch his friend in the arm for being so stupid as to let a girl try to fly the kite. It was a boy’s toy after all.
Then they threatened to punch me unless I paid for it. Both of them.
I slipped by all the grown-ups in the living room on the way to find the piggy bank hidden under my bed. I was crying, but I knew enough not to bother anyone with my problem. Their tone was serious and I was afraid if they found out I had broken something else there would just be more trouble. I was used to not being noticed –because I knew how not to be noticed. It was my fault, after all. I did break the kite. I would have to look after the problem myself.
My uncle was standing in the hall when I came out clutching my precious coins.
“What’s the matter?” he asked.
He noticed. I was afraid, but I choked out the story of how the boys told me to hold the string and run and not look back, but then the kite broke and now they were going to beat me up.
“Let’s go,” he said. “I’ll walk behind you.”
“What?”
“I’m going with you. I want to talk to those guys.”
My uncle was barely more than a teenager, but he was a hockey player, a defenceman. In this part of the world that carries a lot of weight. For one thing, he was nearly a foot taller than everyone else in the family. For another, he was known to spend an inordinate amount of time in the penalty box, which seemed quite all right with everyone who went to cheer at the games.
I walked bravely down the lane with my uncle backing me up. I had never really noticed how magnificently tall he was before. The boys were confused when they saw him. I don’t know whether they wondered if they should run or ask for an autograph. I kind of hoped Uncle would throw some of that influential weight around and knock them over.
Instead he grunted, “How much was that kite?”
“A buck,” one of them said, looking up, way up.
Uncle took out the wallet that hung from a chain attached to his back pocket and handed him a dollar bill.
“And how much did that one cost?” he asked the boy who held an intact version of the one still in the middle of the crash site.
“Seventy-five cents,” he answered, suddenly struck with an uncharacteristic streak of honesty.
Uncle handed him 75 cents and said, “Give her your kite.”
He did so.
“If you ever threaten a girl again you’ll answer to me,” he growled. When they took off running he grinned.
I walked home with my money in one hand, my kite in the other and a new admiration for my uncle in my heart.
Have you ever had a week when the same topic, or the same book or the same quotes keep showing up in unusual places? I keep running into Psalm 18, about how God defends his loved ones. I know that means I need to pay attention, that there is something about Himself I haven’t truly understood before that the Lord wants to show me. I was meditating on this Psalm when the memory of this incident with the kite came back. Our Defender not only walks with us, he covers our debt, he gives us what we never earned and he brings us safely home. God is good that way. He is my hero.
I have a harder time picturing Him in skates and a jersey though. But who knows…
I love you, Lord;
you are my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior;
my God is my rock, in whom I find protection.
(Psalm 18:1,2)