Disappointment… and Promotion

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There’s nothing quite like disappointment to reveal what we really think.

A.W. Tozer wrote: ‘What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.’

Disappointment then, can be a deal breaker for us, or a notice that we are about to be sent to take a course that will upgrade our knowledge and prepare us for a promotion. Disappointment can reveal weaknesses in our assumptions about God and either cause us to turn back or motivate us to press on and pursue him to learn about the aspect of himself that he wants to show us next.

Pioneers learn to handle disappointment well because they need to learn from their own mistakes, simply because there aren’t that many ahead of them who have gone this way before. Learning from one’s own mistakes has the unexpected bonus of appreciating the wisdom and experience of others when the opportunity is there. Pioneers also learn to discern the difference between the wisdom of those who have pressed on in spite of set-backs, and the negativity of those who are sitting in their own disappointment, watching it congeal into bitterness.

God is good and nothing is impossible for Him. There’s always more to learn about him and he wants to draw us into deeper relationship. Keep going.

 

 

Mixed Message

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“You have an odd concept of freedom,” my friend said.

Odd? It was the definition I grew up with –freedom is the ability to choose to obey.

“Can you disobey?” he asked.

“Not without suffering rejection and other dire consequences,” I answered.

“You have an odd concept of freedom,” he said.

Freedom, like grace, was a concept I struggled with during my much-delayed adolescence (that took me well into my forties). It took me a while to figure out that I had accepted mixed messages without question.

Mixed messages are crazy-making.

I just read a recipe that defines mixed message for me. It calls for a bowl full of lovely, fresh, healthy vegetables, sunflower seeds and green grapes. To this collection of organic goodness you add 1/2 a pound of diced fried bacon, eight ounces of grated cheese, and a salad dressing that crams the maximum number of calories possible in the form of fats and sugar into a measuring cup. Healthy with a death wish.

Some people who talk about grace will welcome you into their church and tell you that you cannot earn God’s love and that salvation is a free gift, that Jesus paid it all. They will point out the verses that say the purpose of the law was to demonstrate, like an impossible-to-please teacher who never gave out perfect marks, that you were never quite good enough. You could never obey all the rules perfectly, no matter how hard you tried. But now you are free; you are saved by grace through faith.

That’s it. They welcome you to the fold.

Then they remind you to pick up a copy of the new rules on the way out.

The new rules are book length and some of the pages written in ink so faint you need special secret decoder ring and spy glasses to read them. And guess who has the decoder ring and spy glasses?

Mixed messages are crazy-making. They’re like a green salad that will give you a myocardial infarction before you get to the gluten-free zucchini muffins.

Grace is not sin-consciousness; Grace is Saviour-consciousness. Grace is not about your failure; it’s about Jesus Christ’s success. Grace is not about who you were; it’s about who God sees you as.

And freedom? Freedom is permission to run toward that destiny – person you are becoming in Christ, unencumbered by fear of making mistakes, and being secure in the knowledge that you are cherished by the One who holds his arms open wide.

You are precious in his sight. He absolutely adores you, you know.

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High River -Stronger

 

It’s been a year.

 

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It’s been a year since the rains came down and the floods came up. Our son and his family are back in their house in High River, but it’s still a construction zone.

The kids are back playing soccer and baseball, but I see some of them watching the approaching rain clouds as much as they watch the ball.

 

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The middle school band plays at an outdoor concert for an audience of proud parents, grandparents and siblings who step around puddles in the gravelled yard.

The temporary business structures beside the Saturday artisan’s tents have become the new downtown.

 

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When I ask my granddaughter how her friends are doing she says everything is different , but different is kind of normal now.

Then she asks, “Do you think it’s going to rain like that again?”

There’s a greater maturity, but also something akin to a lost innocence in High River. I suppose that is what happens after any disaster, or after any change in the definition of normal. Whether it’s a flood, a tornado, a serious illness – or a betrayal, wherever we experience unexpected loss we can no longer say, “That would never happen.”

Now we know it can.

And now that we know we are left standing in the playing field on a Saturday morning in June checking the sky for signs of rain, wondering if it will happen again.

“Folks are a bit twitchy when the forecast is for heavy rain in the mountains,” a merchant/artist told me. “It’s understandable -especially for the kids.”

 

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The thing about lost innocence is that it is one thing that can never be restored. You cannot un-see things. When I’m with my family it seems like half a dozen times a day I hear the phrase, “We had one of those, but it was lost in the flood.” My grandchildren don’t have bikes or outdoor toys because even though we offered to replace them, they don’t have anywhere to store them yet. The shed containing their old bikes and toys was also lost in the flood, and that image is still with them.

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Innocence may not be restored but many other things can be. Bikes and sheds and houses can be restored. Purity can be restored. Faith can be restored. Respect, hope,  joy, peace, confidence can all be rebuilt, but they require new firmer foundations than the absence of the experience of suffering.

I asked an older gentleman how he saw the town now, 365 days after the rushing water that poured down from the mountains changed everything.

“It’s the best thing that ever happened to this community, ” he said.

“Why do you say that?”

“We discovered what it means to be a community,” he answered. “We discovered what it means to have real  friends, and who our real friends are. We discovered what it is to work together for more than our own comforts. We discovered the generosity of strangers. We discovered what it is to need help and give help. We discovered faith.”

 

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He smiled sincerely when he said this. He had genuine joy.

“Not everyone is back in their homes yet and a lot of businesses are still in temporary quarters or not even up and running at all. We hope it doesn’t rain like that again, but you know, we also hope it does so we will know if the steps toward flood mitigation are working. We hope another disaster doesn’t happen anywhere in Canada, but we also hope the things we have learned here can be put to use if there is one – when there is one.”

Loss of innocence is being reconciled to the reality of sin in people around us and in ourselves. Loss of innocence is acknowledging that all is not right in the world. The Bible says all creation groans until things are put right again. For some who have survived disaster there lingers an increased fear and greater sensitivity to pain which results in anxiety that hums in the background like the drone of a machine that never shuts off . For some there grows a greater faith that seems to free them from fear of the future. I watched this gentleman in a crowd after church, smiling and greeting folks, shaking hands and giving hugs when he met someone he hadn’t seen for a while. After I took the kids home for lunch I remembered his words.

“The flood showed us that God is faithful and even though we have been down and bone-weary, we now know that with His help we are much stronger than we ever thought we could be.”

 

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Not Ready to Settle

 

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Over the years, I have become convinced that in the Christian life at least two things are certain: God never changes, and we are always changing.
Our lives as Christians are a continual transition from one place to another, one level to another, one understanding to another. The purpose of spiritual light is to bring us into change and growth. The more light we have, the more change we experience; and the more we change (for the better), the more we are brought into higher levels of glory. Unless we are in constant transition, we will stop somewhere along the way and settle down. The Christian life is a frontier. God did not call us to be settlers, but to be pilgrims and pioneers.

-James Goll

 

The Seeker

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Those who seek after a great deal of knowledge and information about the ways of God are really trying to satisfy their reasonings and to attain to God by means other than those of the spirituals. In no such manner can you attain a true and passionate love for the Lord. Such men who seek after God by the acquisition of information about God and acquiring information about the Scriptures are really nothing more than scholars. They do not know the unseen realms, nor do they realize that hidden things of God are found only within the spirit. Nor have they come to touch those joys which abide in the inmost depths of the believer, that place where God keeps His throne and communicates Himself to the one who comes and joins Him in that place.

-Miguel de Molinos (1628-1696)

Take a Chance on Me

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Last night my son and husband and I were talking about worship, and about how worship springs, not from our efforts to do something for God, but “Christ in us” jumping up to acknowledge the presence of the Father (who I call Abba.) It’s like the way the baby John the Baptist leapt in his mother’s womb when the Holy Spirit within him was conscious of the presence of God in Mary. Worship is being conscious of God making us his temple and of the perfect love and unity between Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Worship is what we carry in us. Worship is a gift God fills us with so we have something to give to Him. Music, art, dance, brick-laying, whatever, are merely the vehicles to express our praise.

Unity is when we are conscious of Christ in us, and the perfect Oneness of the Godhead, so we can recognize Christ in others and thus desire to worship together -because it is who we are. It’s in our new DNA.

This morning I had a dream of Jesus giving his children a gift that looked like maggots (ew) but it turns out they were living seeds. They just had to move it, move it, move it. Then he gave me a pack of playing cards and I heard the song, “Take a Chance on Me” -by Abba.

 

 

Jesus singing and dancing to Abba. I love his humour.

Shifting Light

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I’m never bored in the mountains. They are always the same, yet different with every moving cloud, every angle of sun, every shift of season.

 

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I am never bored with God. Like the mountains he never changes, and yet I see many different views of him depending on what aspect of himself he wants to reveal in this season of my life and how willing my heart is to pay attention.

I found myself wanting to jump into a heated discussion about which is more in the character of God, giving his adopted children prosperity and perfect health or teaching them through poverty and suffering. As often happens each side made assumptions about what the other side meant without taking time to listen to their definitions and explanations of terms. I think they were closer than they thought, but somewhere between the lips of one and the ears of the other words morphed into strange bloated thought clouds from another source. Straw men make great flashy bonfires and due to volatility tend to erupt into conflagrations which usually produce more heat than light.

Still, they prompted me to research what the Bible says about the topic. There is a lot of material in there on the dangers of the love of money, the blessings of abundance, the abuse of power and resources, the rewards of trust, the ugliness of selfish wealth, the riches of the Father’s house available to all his children, the unacceptable neglect of the poor … Finding verses to back each person’s hobby horse (proof-texting) is easy.

The following passage caught my attention. (This was after the warning story of the man who hoarded his wealth in new barns only to die that night.):

Then he added to the disciples, “That is why I tell you, don’t worry about life, wondering what you are going to eat. And stop bothering about what clothes you will need. Life is much more important than food, and the body more important than clothes. Think of the ravens. They neither sow nor reap, and they have neither store nor barn, but God feeds them. And how much more valuable do you think you are than birds? Can any of you make himself an inch taller however much he worries about it? And if you can’t manage a little thing like this, why do you worry about anything else? Think of the wild flowers, and how they neither work nor weave. Yet I tell you that Solomon in all his glory was never arrayed like one of these. If God so clothes the grass, which flowers in the field today and is burnt in the stove tomorrow, is he not much more likely to clothe you, you little-faiths? You must not set your heart on what you eat or drink, nor must you live in a state of anxiety. The whole heathen world is busy about getting food and drink, and your Father knows well enough that you need such things. No, set your heart on his kingdom, and your food and drink will come as a matter of course.”

“Don’t be afraid, you tiny flock! Your Father plans to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give the money away. Get yourselves purses that never grow old, inexhaustible treasure in Heaven, where no thief can ever reach it, or moth ruin it. For wherever your treasure is, you may be certain that your heart will be there too!” (Luke 12)

 

Some people read this and say, “See? The poor have more faith. So God wants you to be poor.”

Someone else reads it and says, “See? The wealth of the kingdom is ours! Receive it now by faith.”

Someone else says, “See? The point is  to obsess about neither poverty nor wealth, but to trust God, give generously and be content.”

I was thinking about this when I drove by these mountains. Storm clouds, caught by high winds near Pincher Creek, changed the look of the range every few minutes. By the time I found a place to stop my car, they shifted again. The view reminded me that every time I think I have some aspect God figured out he obscures the familiar and comfortable and shows me another side of his character.

God is not only good, His ways are not our ways, His thoughts are not our thoughts. He is very, very big and has very, very many facets. One snapshot, or one verse of scripture, or one experience is true about him, but perhaps does not reveal the whole truth. There is more. Much more.

 

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But sometimes it is the storms in life, when the familiar is obscured by dark clouds, that reveal important truths about God that we missed before.

Love Expels Fear

Morning Glory

Love will never invoke fear.

Perfect love expels fear,

particularly the fear of punishment.

The one who fears punishment has not been completed through love.

We love because He has first loved us.

(1 John 4:18,19)

The thing about fear is that once you are influenced by it you can be convinced to distrust your own sense of who God is and who you are and hand over spiritual discernment to “the experts” because they claim “extenuating circumstances.” This is how every major cult has started (including the philosophical movements that claim to be non-religious). It’s uncanny how often it manifests first in paranoia-based views of the future, followed by rigid authoritarian hierarchical structures, then strange attitudes toward sex and marriage and family structure. History repeats itself.

The thing about love is that it does not manipulate or coerce. Jesus’ love sets us free.

Actually

 

What if God is actually who he said he is?

What if you are actually who he says you are?

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God has placed a promise and a provision next to every difficulty. When we locate the tribulation, we uncover the revelation that is also present. We stand on the promise, looking at the provision and we rejoice! As we “count it all joy,” [James 1:2] the truth becomes our experience and we are set free. -Graham Cooke

We all live off his generous bounty,
        gift after gift after gift.
    We got the basics from Moses,
        and then this exuberant giving and receiving,
    This endless knowing and understanding—
        all this came through Jesus, the Messiah.
    No one has ever seen God,
        not so much as a glimpse.
    This one-of-a-kind God-Expression,
        who exists at the very heart of the Father,
        has made him plain as day.

(John1:16-18 The Message)